The Void Teachings- #5

September 25, 2003

What is the most important message to get out to people regarding money?

It's not about numbers. It's about faith. You will note on American currency the phrase “In God we trust.” If you faith was 100% in God, you would have all of what you need.

That seems to go counter to the fact that there are many “faithful” people who are really suffering, really poor.

Note that the phrase is “we.” It will take the collective “we” to have the impact on the collective poor. When you reach a critical mass of people who put their faith in God, you will see miracles and the disintegration of poverty. If one had perfect faith, was a true master, then he too would experience what you deem miraculous and would have all his needs met. Yet very few of you indeed are at that level.

So for the rest of us that still have a long way to go, how do we begin to become money masters? What are the first steps?

First, become very clear on what you need- physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. You tend to address your needs only partly which automatically creates an imbalance, not just in your being but in your money affairs as well. Ironically your “wants” can get in the way of your needs- such as “I want a vacation.” So you work so hard to obtain that vacation and in the meantime ignore the need, which is perhaps for quiet, perhaps communion with a higher force, with nature. You postpone the fulfillment of the need, which if you weren't so busy pursuing the want, you could have obtained this very day.

Very often the want camouflages the need. So first you must critically examine the need, or if you prefer the terminology, the motive behind your want. For example, why do you want that vacation? What do you expect it to give you? What qualities? If it's adventure, then bring more adventure into your life this very day. If it's relaxation, then bring in some peace and quiet right now. Do not delay. The longer you allow imbalances to remain in your system, the harder they are to address. So, the most crucial step is identifying true needs, on all levels, as mentioned above and satisfying those.

So few of you are truly aware of your needs at even one of the levels mentioned above- thus so many of you are out of balance. And as you are fond of linguistic connections- here's one for you: איזון (balance) and אוזן (ear). You need to become a listener to that voice inside to find your balance. How much wealthier your world would be if there was a daily ritual of listening to oneself. And though many of you pray, you are not really listening. Listening is the truest form of prayer. Your central prayer, the “shma”- Hear, Israel” starts with the commandment to listen.

The Void Teachings- #4

September 24, 2003

You are still very afraid.

Afraid of what?

Afraid of how immense you really are.

Why is that?

Because it would mean taking the ultimate responsibility for every action, every thought, every feeling you have and to realize the consequences that these have as well. You wast your time trying to bend a spoon when in reality you could bend the world. You doubt the utter reality of these words and that doubt, in actuality, is the only thing- I repeat- the only thing that keeps you from actualizing that grandness.

I would guess that doubt is pretty common to most of us. So how does one begin to eliminate it and begin to realize our greatness?

Learn to be more like a laser- concentrated light- very focused. Your doubts cause you to vacillate and that back and forth movement results in the loss of directed power. One good exercise for practicing this focus is to stare into the innermost core of a flame where the energy is most focused. Notice the further out you go, the further from the core, the more oscillation and movement there is. Focus of will is a very powerful tool and you can use that to practice cutting away at doubt. Note again that in the Hebrew there is great wisdom: פסק/ ספק decree/doubt

Can you feel the tension in the polarity between doubt and decree? One is full of oscillation, the other certainty, a decision. You need to decide what it is you are creating and fully go with that. Your will is the engine, your doubts are the brakes. You can go far far beyond what you dreamed possible when you begin to eliminate doubt.

I asked a question regarding why some of this information comes in the form of Hebrew words.

Language is a powerful tool. Think of it as a computer of sorts. The sounds and letters actually function as a program at a level generally beyond your awareness. Language can be used to create- not just thoughts, but to create matter. The letter patterns carry actual energy patterns and these can be more readily activated via speech. Therefore choose your words very carefully. Realize that דבר (speaking) creates דבר (things- of all sorts.) Be immensely careful and sensitive of your speech for it has power beyond what you know. Better, when in doubt, to be silent and to wait for the proper focus to come before you speak. That is enough for now.

The Void Teachings #3

Feel free to read my intro to The Void Teachings #1, in the earlier post, in order to understand the background to this series.

September 10, 2003
This meditation began with my seeing an image of a flame.
Then came the following Hebrew word.

להבה- לה' בה
To God within- this is what it means to become impassioned, excited- to be filled with the sense of God within you. Remember that this flame (להבה is the Hebrew word for flame) is the eternal flame. You may at times think that it has gone out, but know that this fire is always there within you. Sometimes it is like a coal whose light you can barely discern. At other times it is a roaring heat.

It is mean to felt in your heart (לב). By meditating on your heart and the pulse that is always there, you may more easily attune yourself to this eternal internal flame.* God has designed your bodies in great wisdom and the physical is indeed a metaphor for the spiritual contained within your hearts. Blood is pumped out and the blood returns back. You are meant to both give and receive in beautiful harmony and balance. That out flow and in flow is always present, though usually outside of your awareness. Think of the problems you would experience if only one of these functions were present.

You are meant to be givers and receivers in all things. Remember to keep this natural pulse in harmony. Why else were you given the commandment to give charity- צדקה? It is truly 'צדק ה- God's righteousness- and way of being in the world. God, too, gives and receives. This pulse was initially set in place in the first moment of creation. God is constantly giving to you, breathing love into you and constantly receiving as well. You were created so that God could experience the reception of love from you. And indeed, your very presence is a gift of love which God is constantly receiving. Even when you do not experiencing yourselves as loving, God does.

It is time for you to give more- to give and not to fear what the result will be.

How do I practice that right now? I am at times afraid of little or no income coming in.

Has God ever abandoned you? God does not fear when giving to each of his/her children, even when the “return” may be slow in coming. You all eventually return to God in your awareness. God's knowledge of that is so strong that the divine giving is as natural as your own breath. Practice giving with that same sense of certainty, of love, of giving without fear. It may take the form of money or service. Make it a daily habit.

* A few years later, I discovered a book, Living from the Heart by Puran Bair, which teaches a Sufi based meditation based on the heart rhythm and exactly discusses the points mentioned above.

The Void Teachings - # 2

Feel free to read my intro to The Void Teachings #1, in the earlier post, in order to understand the background to this series.

September 4, 2003

Always ask what are you most afraid of and then send your love to those fears. Know that love and fear cannot coexist together. What does it mean to send love to fear? To love it as a parent would a child who has hurt herself. To recognize that the fear is temporary and is begging to simply be embraced. Fear hates to be pushed away. So embrace it, love it and listen to what it wants. ( a pause...)

Do you have more to say?

Oh, yes (laughter)- always much more. Now about stillness- know that in the non-movement you will learn to feel the living movement and pulse that is in all things. Sounds like an oxymoron, but there you have it. The more still you become, the more you will sense and feel and become. The Hebrew word שקט (quiet) contains the same letters as קשט (decorate). And, indeed, God has chosen to decorate the world with a stillness that speaks, that moves and feels with a resounding beauty.

Where is that in each one of us?

In each one of your cells, in every particle that comprises you.

But I remember learning in high school chemistry about how the electrons zip around the cell nucleus. That hardly seems like stillness to me.

In every cell and particle there is a great deal of space. From this emptiness all is formed. Modern physicists will become more aware of this apparent mystery.

I'm not at all sure I get what you mean.

The point is that you have made a business of busy-ness and from that place very little that is true is created. Creation takes place in the void. Therefore, bless, bless and bless again the seeming voids in your life. They are the source of great creation.

If it seems to go counter to your intution, think of it like this. You know that on the seventh day the Sabbath is created, a time of not doing, of simply being. This is the original state from which all things came. Those cycles of creation from the void are infinite.

The Void Teachings #1

This is the first of a series of silently posed questions (in italics) and answers received in meditation, that date to a period about five years ago, in which my work suddenly dried up for no explicable reason. I knew a major shift was underway, but at the start had no clue what it was about. These messages, which I call “The Void Teachings” began around 1-1/2 months before my father suddenly died and continued for several months following.

September 2, 2003

My dear child. You are not by nature very patient. So you are being given opportunities to practice patience. You can enjoy them, or if you like, you can fight them. But it is so much more fun to enjoy them.

Why does it seem like the cycles of violence world-wide are speeding up?

The cycles of all things have been speeding up. It presents you with an opportunity. With there being so much violence, you can more easily see the patterns and decide what you want to do about those. The choice is always yours. On some level, as a collective, you also made the choice to speed things up and turn your lives into crash courses in learning. So humanity has asked for this acceleration and all that comes with it, though at times it seems totally overwhelming to most of you.

How can we best deal with that sense of being overwhelmed? Lately on both the personal and collective level I have definitely been feeling like that, and a part of me just wants to retreat into my cave and do nothing.

Sometimes doing nothing is a most appropriate response but not one that your culture particularly favors. Remember God tends to favor possibility and choice, so there is never just one right answer or way to dealing with a situation. Generally speaking, what is right for you in a particular moment is what you feel urged to do. What makes it so complicated is learning how to recognize this urge as it is so often overlaid with other voices telling you what you “should” be doing or what is “appropriate.” So you are all pretty much in need of training yourselves to listen to your soul urges since there is so much other noise overlaying those. The best way to listen is to seek that quiet, go inwards and begin to learn how to distinguish between your voice and the others'. This takes a great deal of practice. One method is to notice the body reaction to the different voices as they come up and where you feel a sense of expansion and opening and where you feel the opposite.

Why is it that my work seems to have dried up for now? What does it mean in terms of direction?

First of all, it is a good thing occasionally to fast, especially in a world where so much is moving so fast. Yet few of you are willing to empty your digestive systems even for one day. So can you begin to imagine the resistance to emptying out the other things that comprise your life? It scares you, doesn't it? You immediately want to fill that space. Yet, God loves space and created an awful lot of it. Look at your own bodies, the solar system. There is a tremendous amount of space or what appears to you as emptiness and that scares you half to death. If you only understood how alive that emptiness is, you would visit it much more often often and without as much fear.

You think that your “efforts” to find and create work are basically what brings you your clients? If God wanted to,God could send you lots of work and people in ways you'd never expect and only a very small amount of that has to do with your effort. What really creates your work or lack of it again stems from what your soul urge is. How do you know if right now what your soul urge is is not about becoming familiar with these empty spaces? Basically, whatever one is experiencing is perfect for them in that moment. Yes- including all the familiar curses such as hunger, violence, etc. because each situation carries within in many potential gifts. Emphasis on many. Remember, God loves choice and variety. So even in experiencing hunger, you have a variety of gifts.

Such as?

Experiencing your reaction to deprivation, to fear. Eventually each of you must learn to master this difficult lesson. What if you were told you don't actually need food to survive? You wouldn't believe it. Yet, eventually, when you reach a level of total mastery, you will realize the truth of this. Until then, you master other lessons and gain other gifts on the path: how to deal with fear, the growth of compassion, the urge to take action (of many different kinds.) The list is actually almost infinite in terms of the potential gifts in any one situation.

Anything else for now?

Enjoy the space. It is the hollow instrument, one that is clean and empty, that beautiful music is played upon. Obstructions, dirt affect the sound. Enjoy the cleaning out process.

A Simple Rx for Happiness

You've heard how an apple a day can keep the doctor away? It seems that writing a letter every week or so could do the same for you, especially if you accept a correlation between happiness and health.

Kent State's Dr. Steven Toepfer enlisted students in a study exploring the impact of writing gratitude letters. The students were asked to write one letter every two weeks over a six week period to someone who had positively impacted their lives. The only directions were that the letters should be reflective, positive and contain a high degree of gratitude. Students were then asked to measure a number of factors, including their level of happiness. With each letter written, their happiness levels went up along with their sense of satisfaction and gratitude. 75% of the students mentioned that they were planning on continuing the gratitude writing habit after the course ended. Another study by Sonja Lyubomirsky of the University of California found that a group of people keeping a gratitude journal over a ten week period were happier, exercised more and even had less acne. Go ahead and tell your teenagers about the last benefit and see if they don't start thanking you more...

A longitudinal study on a group of Catholic nuns found that those that expressed thanks and gratitude regularly when they were younger lived up to 10 years longer than those who didn't. I recently started the nightly habit along with my husband of sharing 5 daily gratitudes. What I love about it is that often after hearing his list, I'm reminded of something else to be rejoice over. For more information on gratitude go to: http://gbr.pepperdine.edu/064/gratitude.html

I decided to check out the hypothesis behind gratitude letters for myself and the first letter goes out to you. I know it's cheating a little bit as it's not to an individual but to a community, but what the heck.

Dear fellow inner alchemists,

You continue to surprise and delight me! First, there was your tremendous response to my “name your own price” offer to the first ten people to register for the upcoming “Experiment in Living”course. Within a few hours, my inbox was filled with enthusiastic e-mails and the ten special offer slots were filled. (By the way, there are still some openings under the regular price...)

The letters were heart warming and encouraging, including those from folks outside of Jerusalem and even beyond the borders of Israel. I so appreciate your support. It gives me the faith to continue pursuing my dreams and partner with others seeking to do the same. I want to thank you as well for your comments on my brand new blog. I cherish your wisdom, your humor, your thoughtfulness.

Over the course of the next week or so I'll be posting a number of letters on the blog.The letters contain questions I posed and the answers I received while in meditative prayer during a period in which I was going through a challenging time in my life, about five years ago. Around the world people will soon be celebrating Christmas and Chanukah. Both faiths see these holidays as a time of miracles, a time of finding the light within the darkness. Perhaps some of you are going through a period of struggle, fear, or confusion about something in your life. While it feels a bit risky to share this part of myself as it's quite personal and could be considered too new-age, I know the answers I received gave me tools, hope and faith. I offer them to you in that spirit as my small thanks for your trust and friendship. In gratitude and love,

Tzippi

Uncommon Decencies

Yesterday afternoon I was talking with a friend about how common decencies and simple manners are no longer so commonplace. Here in Israel it's unusual to receive thank you notes, whether via snail or e-mail, for wedding or bar or bat mitzvah gifts. Over and over again I hear of how often people don't receive call backs from messages they've left at institutions or places of business. Littering is rampant here, as is not cleaning up after one's dog. Many folks think nothing of using their cell phones at length in the middle of an ongoing conversation. Teachers complain of how many parents rush to defend their children as right, before even bothering to listen to the educator's point of view. My friend asked where is the line that marks the difference between poor manners and out and out aggression and violence. We both realized it's a slippery slope.

Later that evening, the conclusion we reached was tragically brought home. Two bus drivers' bullying and pushing to be the first to get through a checkpoint led to one driver's decision to pass in a no-passing zone. The bus, carrying a large group of visiting Russian travel agents, careened 80 meters down a slope. 25 people died and many others wounded. The line between putting oneself first and downright criminal behavior was shown to be a slippery slope, indeed.

I don't hold myself up to be a paragon of good behavior. I've made more than my share of selfish choices. Yet yesterday's incident urgently brought home the importance of paying attention to the old fashioned notions of decency, or as we call it in Yiddish, “menschkeit.” Slowing down to allow a car to easily and safely merge into traffic. Allowing someone to pass. Looking the bus driver in the eye and thanking him for deftly giving you both your change and your ticket while simultaneously trying to handle other passengers and safely maneuver in crazy traffic. Acknowledging gifts with a simple thank you card or e-mail, even if this is considered passe.

Rudeness is bad for business. A 1999 survey conducted by Eticon Inc. of business people in the U.S. showed that 58% of people decide to take their business elsewhere when they encounter rude behavior. More than 76% of employers like receiving a post-interview thank-you note, but only 36% of applicants write them according to a survey by Accountemps, a staffing firm in Menlo Park, California.

Being a kind decent human being also carries benefits for us as individuals. A study carried out by Allan Luks of more than 3,000 volunteers of all ages showed a strong connection between helping others and improved physical and emotional health, increased self worth and optimism. Other research has shown that acting in kind ways can add years to your life. And lest you think that you might have a faulty kindness gene, M.J. Ryan, author of The Giving Heart: Unlocking the Transformative Power of Generosity in Your Life and one of the authors of Random Acts of Kindness  claims that you can train yourself to be nicer. He suggests that we don't have to become saints, but that each of us can find the particular acts of kindness that draw us, whether it's visiting someone sick, helping a busy single parent or just being nice to the people you come into contact with every day.

More than ever before, we need to move from a “me” based society to a “we” based one. Our grandparents and parents were right all along. Being a mensch is good for business, good for our health and safety, good for the planet.

3 Life Changing Questions

What have been the most powerful questions you have ever asked yourself? When have you or someone else asked a question that quite literally changed your life?

This post is dedicated to putting the “quest” back into the word “question.” In Hebrew the root for the word question is שאל, which also stands for underworld, nether regions, abyss. It's even darker meanings are Hades, or grave. Both aspects of the word, in the two different languages, reflect the varied ways questions can affect us. Questions can propel us on journeys to the edges and beyond of our life experience or into the depths of what we carry within, including all the shadowy sides. Questions, too, can lift us up and forward like “what would you like to do or experience if you knew you couldn't fail and would be given all the necessary resources?” Or they can drag us down, down, down. Just ask yourself “what are some of my biggest regrets in life?” or “when was the last time I felt really bad?”

Small children are masters at asking questions. Why is the sky blue? How does the voice come out of the phone? Does god have mother? How does the grass grow? Why is that man crying? Or the famous road trip question of “are we there yet?” that so infuriates parents yet remains the riddle many of us still silently ask ourselves when it comes to our lives.

Here are a few of my favorite life changing questions.

1. What am I experiencing right now?

A dear friend of mine, who lost her beloved husband at a young age, told me that question helped her survive her grief and thrive beyond it. When her fear or sadness overwhelmed her, she'd focus on the feeling, including all the body sensations, and what was unbearable became bearable, in that moment.

I experienced this first hand in a powerful way years ago at a meditation retreat. All the sitting in the same position brought tremendous pain in my legs during a particular session. I tried calming myself, I tried lamaze breathing, and after each small bout of relief, the pain returned exponentially intensified. I observed myself thinking “Oh, god, how much longer is this going to last? When is it going to stop? How much worse can it get? I've been through so much already.” Basically I kept cycling between how much agony I had already experienced and how much more I was likely to experience. Nothing was working.

Then the pain became so intense, it took all I had just to get through the next breath and all thinking about how bad the last breath had been or how terrible the next one was likely to be was gone. I was in the breath of the present moment 100% and the past and future ceased to exist. It was still intense pain, but it was pain without the suffering.Then the miraculous happened. Suddenly, remarkably, all the pain just disappeared. Not gradually. Not in increments. It was as if someone had flipped off switch and the the pain was no longer there. Maybe because I was no longer there. I was here. I wouldn't have believed it possible, unless I had experienced it first hand. That moment was one of my life changing moments. That, as Eckhart Tolle has described, is the power of now.

2. Why don't you either do it or shut up? A cruder verion of this is: When are you going to shit or get off the pot?

I admit, it's not a nice question, but asked at the right time, it can be tremendously effective. It forces one to commit. All truly great accomplishments first require committment. My husband was challenged by this question years ago. Happy in his job as a journalist, he also yearned to leave and travel. He talked all the time about his desire to just quit work and see the world. One night, eating in a restaurant with a friend, she said, “you keep talking about quitting and going abroad- so why don't you either do it or shut up?” That shut his mouth and opened up his life. He left the job, traveled to Europe, eventually coming to Israel and forging a life here. Talk about a life changing question!

Now that I've hit my fifties and I realize that time is a limited commodity, I find myself asking this question a lot. One of the great benefits of middle age is that you begin to realize procrastination is highly overrated, especially when you hear of folks your age who planned to travel to Tahiti, learn how to speak fluent French, call that long lost friend, or reconcile with their parents, but died before they had the chance. I figure, do it now while you still have your knees and can usually remember where you put the keys.

3. How will I feel about this in 10 minutes? 10 months? 10 years?

I forgot who originally coined this series of questions but it's great for helping one keep perspective. Ever felt bad about something you said? Gotten a horrendous haircut? Been faced with a challenge or big opportunity that scares you half to death? Let's look a the bad haircut. In 10 minutes, you'll still feel pretty lousy. In 10 months, your hair will certainly have grown out, and in 10 years,you'll have gone through how many more haircuts? How about the big opportunity or challenge? Yes, that will still scare you in 10 minutes, but in 10 months you will have had enough experience under your belt to know whether you're doing what you want or not, and in 10 years you may realize that was one of your life's major turning points.

I hope you'll click below on comments and share some of your life changing questions with me.

The Five Minute Challenge

Most people think it takes a long time to change or to get something done. But it doesn't have to.

Sometimes, when I am really not in the mood to work on something, one of the ways I get through it is to spend just five minutes on the task. That's why I dared myself to spend just five minutes writing this post. It's remarkable what you can get accomplished when you know your time is limited.

My friend Margalit Jakob, who originally gave me this idea, began practicing violin for just five minutes a day. Now she plays in a community orchestra. I know someone else who hates housework and spends again, just five minutes a day on cleaning tasks. She claims that she packs an awful lot of work into those five minutes because she is so focused. The five minute challenge can be applied to those things we don't want to do or don't think we'll be able to do. By setting boundaries around the task at hand the tough becomes tolerable and the impossible, possible. And sometimes, by setting the five minute clock, time miraculously expands and we end up so engrossed in what we've started that we just keep going....

In our information dense, technology packed world, time is rapidly approaching the value of gold or even diamonds. For some of us, five minutes of this precious commodity holds the opposite promise and challenge- how to slow down and be present. I don't particularly like hang ing out laundry, but I recall fondly once such occasion that I was fully present as I hung each article of clothing, feeling the dampness and texture of the fabric, the movements of my fingers opening and closing the clothes pins, the sound of the clothes line as I moved it forward. That five minutes brought me as close to bliss as any household chore I can remember doing.

So, pick something you want to do or dream of doing but think it's impossible, and spend a little bit of time every day on that. Spend as well, five minute increments as often as you can throughout the day, practicing being present to whatever you are doing- whether it is taking a break or facing some boring, or distasteful or challenging task. Somewhere I once read that if a sailor changes his course just one degree, within 6 months he'd be a whole hemisphere away from his original destination. I have no idea if it's true, but it's a good metaphor for change. One degree or five minutes of being fully engaged. Feel free to post me a message on what five minute challenge you have chosen. Then later, write again and let me know where you are six months down the road...

dirty little secrets

Dirty little secrets. We all have them. Some we may never choose to tell. But sometimes it can be cathartic to share. So here goes....

The real story behind writing my first blog post. Imagine a horror music score playing in the background.

How long did it take me to write yesterday's post? At least an hour, maybe two. How many times did I lose the entire post that I finally published yesterday? Twice. Once is understandable, maybe. Twice is stupid. Especially if you've been warned to do something simple and basic by your tech savvy child, if you're lucky enough to have one of those. I do. And I didn't listen. If I had only done the smart thing and first written it as a word document and saved it. But no, I had to write directly on the blog...

Dirtly little secret #1. Sometimes I convince myself I know what I'm doing when I really don't have a clue.
Dirty little secret #2. I'm technologically challenged in a major way.
Dirty little secret #3. Sometimes I don't listen to perfectly reasonable advice because... see dirty little secret #1.

I feel so relieved to get that off my chest. I am writing this post first on a word document. Now I've earned some bragging rights.

I've come a long way, baby. As a kid, I started lots of things. I was the great beginner. I never finished most of my projects. When frustrated or upset, I actually banged my head against the wall, or so my mother tells me. I must have damaged the links in the brain to those memories via the head banging. With some maturity I learned the qualities of faith and patience, which I'm still working hard to refine and further develop. For proof, read on...

I was majorly upset when I lost the first post attempt. I cursed. I got incredibly annoyed, but then I sat down and rewrote the whole thing. The second time, I really almost lost it. Especially when the International Critics Choir started singing. You've heard them perform before, right? They're a top notch group. Some of their hits are “You're Such an Idiot,” “Who Told You You Could Do This?,” “Forget the Whole Idea- You Don't Have What it Takes,” and “Go Bang Your Head Against the Wall.”

After a major pout where I almost reverted and followed the instructions in the last song title, I sat down yet again to reconstruct what I wrote. And I think it was better. Yes, I'm proud. I stuck with it. I was determined to get that blog started, despite dirtly little secret #2. Practice doesn't make perfect, ( I am anti-perfectionism, such a waste of time) but it makes for much improved.

To do anything worthwhile, you need a very healthy dose of perserverance. Tons of folks give up after the first obstacle or challenge. More give up after the next couple. A few really fine folks give up just when they are about to succeed. If they only knew they were 83% or 97% of the way there. Yet one of the hardest things is that we often don't know when we are so so close to the goal.

So restart something today that you have given up on. I dare you. You may be closer than you think. And even if you have a long long way to go, you can learn from and be inspired by some of the world masters.

Check out these links:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4B-r8KJhlE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2I0DRk8dFjI

The power of yes!

'There's only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that's your own self." Aldous Huxley

Welcome to Inner Alchemist. What's in the name?  The medieval alchemists, as they performed their experiments to transmute metal into gold, also believed that in the process they were working on refining themselves. Becoming inner alchemists means putting the focus first on the inner, rather than the outer product, and concerning ourselves with taking the base elements in life- our own doubts and fears and the challenges that life throws us- and turning those into treasure.  

As an old saying goes, change yourself- change the world. The transformation of our planet seems overwhelming with global warming, economic crises and a multitude of other ills. What can just one person do? Some would say the renovation job is beyond our capability- that the world is condemned- soon not fit for habitation. I contend it is both our privelege and responsibility to lay the foundation stones by each of us making the changes first in ourselves, moving from fear to faith, lies to love, anger to acceptance and appreciation, impotence to initiative. Becoming an inner alchemist also means you become an outer one. It's both that hard and that simple.

Here, you'll find real tools for doing so through future stories, exercises, inspiring free courses and videos.

I'd like to begin this first post with a personal story. Recently my sister gave me two gifts for my birthday. One, a decadent flourless chocolate cake, the other the Flat Belly Diet book. Yes, my sister really does love me even if the presents seem to destine me to deep ambivalence. Both were much appreciated, though the first was easier to digest. But the latter came in handy too, since reaching mid-age, I now am wrestling with a stubborn bulge in the middle. Though I eat pretty well, practice yoga and am fairly active, I thought that was enough. After reading, I made some dietary changes and committed to a daily brisk walk.

Yesterday I put in a real vigorous walk and then walked lots more during errands. So when my friend K. called me that evening to join her on a walk, I almost said no. I had to push myself to say yes.

It was a beautiful night, full moon. When we got to the promenade near my house which has spectacular views of the city, we ran into a mutual girlfriend, Z. Z was talking to her friend, A., and from the looks of it, pretty frustrated and angry with him. She explained that the %*^&^* fellow had just gotten himself kicked out of rehab after she had gone to a lot of trouble to find and get him into the right program. Z. further mentioned that many very wonderful people had gone way out on a limb for him. She had to be somewhere else so asked if the two of us would talk some sense into A. It would have been easy to say no. But for some reason, I said yes. I asked him why so many special people seemed to care about him and wanted to help him. He said he'd asked himself the same question and had no answer. He couldn't figure it out.

Z. shared her daughter's story of how she had been kicked out of rehab a number of times, but finally stuck with it and got clean. Z. urged him to do whatever it took to get back into the program, begging if necessary. A. said he was embarrassed to do so. I asked him why he wasn't embarrassed to take advantage of the time and effort so many people invested in him. I asked him if he believed in a higher source, God, whatever he wanted to call it. He said he did. I asked him why he wasn't embarrassed to mess with the gift he'd been given of his own life. None of this seemed to move him. He was quite expert at evading responsibility, commitment. Most addicts are. Then I asked him if I could ask one last question. He agreed.

I whispered this into his ear. Why do so many terrific people seemed to care so deeply about you? Could it be that you actually deserve their love? That you really deserve to be loved?

He got very quiet. Then he looked directly into my eyes and said, “Now THAT really makes me want to do something and change.”

When I looked back at him, I saw a part of myself. The part that feels unworthy and unloved. The part that feels neglected and marginalized. The part of me that feels that I don't have the power to change.

Today is A.'s birthday. I wish you well. I wish you healing. I have no idea whether you will choose that change. I hope my question to you will help. But I know your answer changed me, helped me to feel a bit more loving and lovable. And to think it all started by my pushing myself to say yes. Isn't it amazing what the universe can orchestrate, a full moon, a beautiful night, a transforming rendezvous with friends and strangers, when we dare to say yes?